The Count's World, Episode 1
by The Great Allie
Summary: While Count Bleck and Tippi are taking a couple's vacation, the minions decide to interfere with Nastasia's love life. PLEASE SEE MY PROFILE FOR AN EXPLANATION OF THE SERIES'S SETTING.
1. 1 dash 1

_This takes place on a continuity after the events of Super Paper Mario, where Count Bleck, together with Tippi, is trying to create the perfect world- this time with love and compassion, and the aid of the Beige Prognosticus. Returning to the scene are some old friends.. and some older friends!_

_I hope this will be the first of a series, but if it isn't, then it isn't. I hope you like it. After all, it's for you._

EPISODE 1-1

"Minions!" Count Bleck's voice boomed through the meeting room. "All is going as we planned it!"

"Hail Bleck!" came the rallying reply.

"Yes, yes," Count Bleck said. "You have been doing very well with our Perfect World project. Count Bleck is pleased."

"It feels good teh be usin' me chunks again, Count!" said O'Chunks.

Mimi agreed, "I like being back, too! Tee hee!"

Count Bleck nodded. "Yes, it's a nice feeling to be doing good again after so long... However, I regret I have been so busy, I've been neglecting Lady Timpani."

Mimi gasped. "Oh, gosh, Count, I'm sorry-"

Count Bleck put his hand up. "Please hold your tongue until I finish, Mimi."

"Oops! Sorry!"

"Thank you," said Count Bleck. "As I was saying, to make up for it, we have decided to go away together for a short time."

Count Bleck put his hand behind his back and looked down at his minions who, after everything, were still so loyal to him.

"Can I talk now?" asked Mimi.

"Oh! Yes, of course, sorry."

"Well, I just think it's so sweet!" gushed Mimi. "Your little couple's vacation. Sigh... I wish I had a true love, too."

"I wish yeh did, too," ribbed O'Chunks. "It's easier teh listen to ya prattelin' on when yer fawnin over an actual person."

Mimi spun around on her spindly legs and glared daggers at O'Chunks. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I do believe he's making fun of you," said Dimentio in a singsong voice.

Count Bleck held up his hands again. "Settle down!" he said in an authoritative voice. "I don't want you fighting amongst yourselves. This is exactly what we're trying to get rid of in these worlds."

"Sorry, Count Bleck," Mimi and O'Chunks said as they hung their heads in synchronized shame.

Count Bleck nodded. "And with that, I leave. Nastasia is in charge."

And with that, he did leave. He warped out with the Beige Prognosticus, leaving Mimi, O'Chunks, and Dimentio by themselves. He left so fast, they were still giving their goodbyes as he left.

"Don't yeh be worryin' aboot a thing, Count!" O'Chunks called.

"We'll take care of everything!" said Mimi.

"Yes, don't worry about a thing..." Dimentio said, smiling smugly.

Mimi turned to look down at Dimentio. "I don't like the way you said that," she said suspiciously.

"I'm sorry," said Dimentio. "How would you like me to say it?"

"How did you get back in here, anyway?" Mimi demanded, her stick-like hands on her hips.

O'Chunks grabbed her by the elbow and jumped down to the floor below. "SAY, MIMI," he said loudly. "Why don't we go find, Nastasia, eh? Get our assignments!" He pulled her ear close to his mouth and hissed, "Psst! Don't ask questions, lass. I don't like to think how he'll answer 'em."

"Oh, my."

"Aye."

Mimi and O'Chunks traveled down the halls of Castle Bleck, with Dimentio trailing a ways behind them. After a few turns, they made it to Nastasia's room.

"'Ey, Nassie!" O'Chunks called as he knocked on the door. "The Count just left. 'E said yeh'd be givin' us our assignments."

There was no response.

Mimi tapped lightly on the door. "Nastasia?" Mimi called sweetly. "Are you there?"

"I'm at my desk," Nastasia called from the other side of the door. Her voice sounded clogged and nasally.

Mimi opened the door. Nastasia was at her desk with her face in her hands. Her desk was surrounded by crumpled tissues as thick as snow. She looked up at her friends with red, swollen eyes. "So, uh, what can I do for you?"

"Oh, my," said Dimentio, looking around her room.

"Oy, Nastasia!" said O'Chunks. "What's been eatin' yeh, lass?"

"All over the place, it seems," Dimentio added.

"Can I help you?" Nastasia asked.

"Gosh, I could ask you the same question," said Mimi. She walked up to Nastasia and put a comforting arm around her shoulder. Are you okay?"

"Yeah," said Nastasia. "I've just been... BWAH! WAAAH!" she suddenly burst into tears again.

Mimi wasn't sure what to do. First she tried to comfort her by hugging her, but that wasn't right. Then she let go and waited for her to stop, but it made her feel like a big meanie. O'Chunks and Dimentio, not entirely comfortable with female emotions, simply looked in different directions and pretended they couldn't hear her.

Finally, Nastasia got herself under control. She straightened her glasses and said, "I'm sorry. I still want to be loyal to him...but when I see him and her together like that, I just... BWAAAAH!" And once again, she couldn't help herself and started bawling.

O'Chunks decided to try saying something. The best he could come up with was, "There now, lassie, chin up."

"Don't cry, Nastasia, please don't cry!" Mimi put her arms around Nastasia, and Nastasia returned the comfort hug.

Finally, she let go and wiped her eyes clean. She took a few deep breaths, waited a good long moment, and said, "I'm sorry. I lost control. I feel better now."

"You don't look better," Dimentio said.

"Dimentio!" Mimi snapped.

Dimentio threw his hands up and shrugged.

"Look, this is just something I'll have to deal with," Nastasia said as she turned back to her desk. "Now, you came for your assignments, I believe?"

Mimi sighed. "Gosh, I wish we could help you..." Suddenly, her face brightened up. "Hey!" she said with glee. "Maybe we can!"

Dimentio snapped his fingers. "Ciao!" he said, and quickly disappeared.

O'Chunks, who didn't have an easy escape route, went along. "What d'yeh mean, Mimi?" he asked.

"I'm not sure," Mimi explained. "But maybe it wouldn't hurt Nastasia so much to see Tippi and the Count together if she had somebody of her own."

Nastasia spun around in her chair. "What? Oh, no. No. Yeah, sorry, but there's no way I could do that, 'K?"

Dimentio reappeared between Mimi and O'Chunks, hanging in the air and looking around curiously.

Mimi continued, "Well, I mean, maybe you don't have to, like, start seeing anybody, but if you knew that there might be someone else for you, it might not hurt so much to loose this one, you know? It worked when I broke up with Sean. I knew there were other people in the world, and that kept me going until I met Gary."

"No, I couldn't," said Nastasia, slumping back over her desk. "Let's just drop it, 'K?"

"Oh, I think it's a wonderful idea," Dimentio said encouragingly. "It's always a good thing to expand your horizons."

"Ah, I'm not sure it's such a good idea," said O'Chunks uncertainly. "I mean, aren't these things supposed to take their own time, and all?"

"Oh be quiet," Mimi said to him, "You don't know anything about girls."

"I'm just not sure it works that way."

Dimentio laughed. "Oh, what do you know about love?"

"What do YOU know about love?"

"What do ANY of you know about love!" Nastasia shouted, slamming her fist on the desk.

The other three looked at her, stunned. Nastasia straightened her glasses and turned back to her desk.

Finally, Mimi said, "Golly, Nastasia... I'm sorry... I just don't like to see you so unhappy... I hate that we can't help."

There was another silence as everybody shifted uncomfortably.

Nastasia broke it and said, "Well, all right. I suppose it couldn't hurt to try any more than it hurts now."

Dimentio snapped his fingers. "Splendid!" he said happily. "I shall bring the snacks!"

* * *

Bleck and Tippi appeared in a flash in the middle of town square. Bleck took a deep breath of fresh air. "Aah... here we are, my dear Timpani," he said. "Are you ready to begin our vacation?"

Tippi looked around before coming to a rest on Bleck's hat. "Where are we?" she asked.

"This is Rogueport," said Bleck, sweeping his arm around. "Home of the Pianta Parlor, the Trouble Center, and this lovely hangman's noose right here... look at that, doesn't that just set the scene?"

Tippi gasped. "But... but Blumiere, Rogueport is home to all the thieves and ne'er-do-wells of the world! Why on earth would you bring me to some place this dangerous?"

"Don't worry," said Bleck. He held out his finger for Tippi. She moved to it, and he brought her down to his face. "I told you I would take you somewhere that would accept our love. And here in Rogueport... well, they just don't ask many questions."

Tippi sighed. "But... but Blumiere..."

"Hold on a moment," said Bleck. He turned around, where a craw was crouched behind him, reaching out to pick his pocket. The craw looked up at him.

"If you try it, I will send your head to a different dimension than your body," said Bleck.

"I was just passin' by," said the craw.

"That's right, you were," said Bleck, nudging him along with his staff.

The craw hunched over and glowered at Bleck as he skittered along, out of the way.

Tippi went back to rest on Bleck's hat. "I feel so safe around you, Blumiere," she sighed.


	2. 1 dash 2

EPISODE 1-2

Mimi was rooting through her closet, tossing her various outfits aside as she tunneled deep into the back. Nastasia sat on Mimi's bed, shifting uncomfortably and actively wishing she had not agreed to this. The only other person present was Dimentio, who was hanging in midair in the corner of the room, with his usual cheerful expression.

Finally, Nastasia had to ask, "Um, what are you looking for, exactly?"

"Hang on," Mimi called from deep in the closet. "I think... yeah, I got it! Hang on!" She tugged as hard as she could, trying to free her treasure from the closet's mysterious layers. "I almost got it!" she shouted.

Dimentio stepped up behind Mimi, grabbed her around the middle, and gave a large tug. They both went sprawling down on the ground, but Dimentio was prepared and did a backwards roll, sticking his landing on his feet. Mimi tumbled backwards and hit her head against the baseboard of her room.

"Ow!" she yelped.

"Oh, I'm sorry about that," Dimentio said. "I thought you would tuck and roll."

Mimi stood up and straightened her pigtails. "How would I know to do that?"

Nastasia shook her head and put her hand over her face.

"I thought we had a thing," Dimentio explained. "I suppose we don't, then?"

"I never know what you're talking about, Dimentio." Mimi bent back down and picked up her treasure- a book with a plain, pink plaid cloth cover. "Here, this will have all the advice we need. I wrote down everything I ever learned about boys in it."

"Oh, it's your diary," said Dimentio.

Mimi ignored him. She sat down on the bed next to Nastasia and opened the book. "Okay, the writing's a little hard to read, so bear with me."

Nastasia and Dimentio peered over Mimi's shoulder and looked at the book. It was written in pink, cursive, with all the is and js dotted with little smiles or hearts.

Dimentio gagged.

Mimi slammed the book shut. "Girls only, Dimentio!" she scolded. "You can go wait outside and wait with O'Chunks."

Dimentio shrugged. "Fine by me," he said. "And so I am gone, like the strip of bacon left too close to the dogs nose. Ciao!" And he teleported out.

Mimi sighed with relief. "Glad he's gone," she said. "I swear, he gives me the creeps sometimes. Anyway, back to the book."

Nastasia had to let go of her secret hope that Dimentio would drag Mimi off into some sort of conflict that would distract her from the task at hand. But Mimi's resolve would not be wavered, and now she was stuck sitting on the bed with her, going over one of her old diaries and forcing herself to think about how the Count would never love her.

She was afraid she was going to start crying again.

"Now this chunk here," said Mimi, grabbing a handful of pages, "is from when I was in love with Rick. Rick was a smart guy, and you're smart. Rick liked me cause he thought I was sooo smart, too. Anyway, Rick was working on this math problem for his job. I think he build machines or something? Anyway, saw what he was doing and told him he had to substitute the variables, or something... we went out for like three months after that." She thumbed through the pages. "This next chunk is from when I was dating Steve. Steve bought and sold Catch Cards, and he was kind of a geek, but it was okay because he was a cute geek. He used to pull on my pigtails and make ringing noises like they were bells. See, make a note of that, Nassy. And after that I went out with John, and he noticed me this time, because I was wearing this supercute new pair of shoes..."

Nastasia glanced at her watch. Three minutes had passed- not nearly long enough for Mimi to loose interest. She groaned inwardly.

Outside Mimi's door, Dimentio had called over O'Chunks and they were listening in.

"That poor lass," O'Chunks whispered. "Somebody ought to help her."

"I'll pull the fire alarm if you can make smoke somehow," offered Dimentio.

"Nah," said O'Chunks. "We just have to get her to change gears."

"Explain to me how staging a fire wouldn't get her to change gears," said Dimentio, crossing his arms.

* * *

Count Bleck and Tippi were sitting at a table in the inn together, sharing a dinner of Shroom Fry. The crowd was thin that night- the only other people present were a mouser and a bob-omb at the next table, and two X-Nauts at the bar. Bleck and Tippi were sitting in the corner, as isolated from the rest as they could be.

"A quick dinner and then we'll retire to our room," said Count Bleck, taking another forkful. "We'll probably not want to go out after dark in this town. I just wouldn't want to start any trouble." He took a bite.

Tippi flapped her wings impatiently. "It's not a problem," she said quickly. "I don't even know if I really want to spend too much time sightseeing around this place..."

Count Bleck sighed. "This isn't what you had in mind, is it?"

"No, no, it's fine," Tippi said quickly. "I just... well... this isn't what I had in mind."

"There are many other places we could go," Count Bleck said quickly. "Petalburg is very nice this time of year... or what about Poshley Heights? Not to mention how close we are to Mushroom Kingdom. Have you ever seen snow? Shiver City is always lovely."

Tippi laughed. "Oh, Blumiere."

Count Bleck stroked her back with his finger. He loved the sound of her laugh so much, and still remembered how badly he'd missed it.

"Blumiere," Tippi repeated, "I don't care where we go, as long as we're there together."

"Thank you," said Count Bleck. "That's so... sappy of you." He was smiling when he said it, though.

They sat together for a while longer. It was quiet in the dining room, especially for the town's standards. Every now and again there would be noise from movement, but overall it was very soothing.

Suddenly, Count Bleck turned around in his chair to face the two X-Nauts. Tippi glanced over and saw them suddenly turning back to the bar, and she realized that they had been staring at them.

"Can I help you?" asked Count Bleck, somewhere between 'polite' and 'annoyed.'

"Nah," said the first X-Naut. "It's nothin', we're sorry. I just never saw anything like you before."

"I never saw anything like you before, neither," Count Bleck said. He purposefully mimicked their speech, and it made Tippi giggle. Then he tipped his hat. "I'm from the Tribe of Darkness," he continued. "And this is my wife, a pixl. And you are... X-Nauts, am I correct?"

"Yeah," the X-Naut replied, looking back cautiously. His silent partner hunched even further over the bar and muttered something under his breath.

"Still live on the moon, then? Asked Count Bleck."

"Nah," said the X-Naut. "Well, not really, anyway. Our army isn't doing a lot these days."

"Is that so," said Count Bleck to himself. Then he took a card out of his cape and handed it over to the X-Naut. "Well, if you ever feel like you need a change of pace, look me up. My organization is always looking for new faces."

The X-Naut took the card. "Thanks, man," he said. "We'd better get going. Come on, Gary." He gave his companion a tug, then put a few coins down on the counter. then they left, leaving just the mouser and bob-omb as the only other patrons in the dining room.

Tippi was staring at Count Bleck with interest as he tucked his cape back in place and went back to his meal. He looked up at her as he noticed her staring. "What?" he asked with a shrug. "I'm thinking of expanding our organization."

"I've never seen you act like that before," said Tippi.

"Like what?" Count Bleck asked.

"Never mind," Tippi said, and continued to eat.

"No, really," he pressed. He leaned over on the table and put his head next to hers. "What did you mean?"

Tippi thought for a moment. "Well," she said carefully. "I've never seen you act like just another person before... like you really fit in where you were. You just looked so natural, striking up a conversation with them. I must say, I like that a lot."

Count Bleck laughed, and Tippi smiled. "Is that so?" he said. "Interesting, mused Count Bleck. I must remember that for future reference. You don't think I ever acted like I belonged before?"

"No," said Tippi. "I only ever knew you as a man from the Tribe of Darkness who was going against his society to follow his heart. You never fit in- you were always going against."

They both finished eating in silence. Count Bleck was pondering what Tippi had said. And Tippi knew that when you really connected with someone, you didn't always need to talk.

* * *

Back at Castle Bleck, the minions were all gathered in Count Bleck's back room. Mimi was sitting in a chair adjacent to Nastasia, for some one-on-one coaching. O'Chunks and Dimentio, while present, were standing to the side and letting her work her 'magic.'

"Now, Nastasia," Mimi was saying, "If you want boys to fall for you, you have to make sure you look cute. That's the first thing they'll notice."

"K... um, how do you think I should do that?" asked Nastasia.

"Oh, lots of ways," Mimi said. She twirled her pigtails as she thought, with a dreamy look settling across her face. "We could change your hair, buy a cute new outfit, and see what works best... that's what I do to look cute."

"Oh!" said Dimentio in surprise. "That's what that is?"

Mimi spun around, leaning over the back of her chair, and glared at Dimentio. "What?" she snapped. "Don't you think this is cute?"

Dimentio put up his hands. "Oh, no, it's fine. It's fine."

"What did you mean, then?" asked Mimi.

Dimentio shrugged.

Mimi turned back to Nastasia. "How long is your hair?" she asked. "Maybe you could try wearing it down. Or if you don't want it in the way, we could try a nice braid, or maybe pigtails."

"Well..." Nastasia thought.

Dimentio interrupted, "Well, if you really want to know, it's unappealing when you try so hard to look cute, Mimi."

O'Chunks put his face in his hands. "Oh, chunks..." he groaned.

Mimi jumped on the floor and began to twist her head and body into the giant spider. "WANNA SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I DON'T TRY?" she snarled. "MIMIMIMIMIMIMIMI!"

Dimentio snapped his fingers and disappeared. Mimi crawled across the floor and onto the ceiling.

Then Dimentio reappeared next to Nastasia. "Goodness," he said, "I didn't mean to upset you so much."

Nastasia straightened her glasses. "You know," she said, "I appreciate the thought, but I don't think this is what I want after all."

Mimi dropped from the ceiling. "Nonsense!" she said cheerfully. "We're just not warmed up yet!"

Nastasia jumped off her chair and headed to the door. "Um, I'm gonna have to ask you to stay out of my love life... 'K?" She slammed the door shut behind her.

Mimi sighed and backed up to the wall. "Oh dear... we've made it worse, haven't we?"

"Oh, no, that was splendid!" Dimentio said happily. "Don't give up!"

"You're right!" Mimi jumped up. "Maybe we just need some more help! I know someone who could give us a whole new perspective on this!"

"'Ey!" O'Chunks said suddenly. "I may not be the smartest one in the room, but I don't think there's anyone we could call to make this situation any better!"

"Why don't we call our old friend, Mr. L?" Mimi said. "He might be able to help!"

O'Chunks shook his head. "Now, see, I don't consider that helpin'. And what does 'e know aboot these things, anyway?"

"He's a guy," Mimi explained. "I mean, he's a normal guy. He'll be able to tell me what I'm doing wrong!"

"A fresh perspective never hurt," said Dimentio. "I'll call for him immediately."


	3. 1 dash 3

_Dear Flowerstar, and Anyone Else who Noticed,_

_You are totally right. Tippi DOESN'T have a back. I'm looking really hard at a picture of her right now, and I could have sworn that there was a rectangle between her triangle wings, which I interpreted to be a back, but there isn't. And now I'm not entirely sure why I thought there was. So... Everybody forget I wrote that, okay? Wonderful. Don't make me brainwash you... 'K?_

_UPDATE 2012: Now that I picture Tippi the way she appears on my deviantArt from the Super Mario-Kun comics, she once again has a back in my head._

EPISODE 1-3

"I came as soon as I heard!" said Mr. L, as he walked down the hallway with Dimentio. "So, what's the deal? Why did you need me?"

"Oh, Mimi has a little project she's working on," Dimentio said offhandedly. "She just wants a fresh perspective on it. Are you sure you aren't busy?"

"Busy? Nah," said Mr. L with a shrug. "My bro is on another one of his adventures, so I don't really have a lot to do except hang around the house. It's nice to get out and have a change of scenery, you know? And the costume fits me so nice," he added, holding out his arms and looking down at his overalls. "These fit better than my regular overalls. Or the ones that make me throw fire." He looked up at Dimentio and asked, "Wait, weren't you the evil one in the group that tried to destroy everything?"

"No," said Dimentio. "You must be thinking of O'Chunks."

"No, wait, I remember, because you had the giant jester robot-"

"I never had a robot," Dimentio said plainly. "I would like to have one, though. That would be fun. Maybe someday you could take me out for a spin in your Brobot."

"Hey, yeah!"

Dimentio rounded a corner to the break room where Mimi and O'Chunks were waiting. He nudged Mr. L into the room. "Play nice, you three," he said. "Have a good day, and I'll pick you up at four."

"Aren't you coming?" asked Mr. L.

"Oh, no," Dimentio replied. "I have far too much work to do. You have fun, though. Ciao!" And with that, he disappeared.

Mr. L found that suspicious, but then again, everything Dimentio did was suspicious. He pushed the thought out of his mind and went to say hello to his old friends.

"Hi, Mr L!" Mimi shouted as soon as he stepped into the room. "How ya doin'?" She jumped up and threw her arms around him. "Gosh, I miss you when you go away! How have you been?"

"Uh, just fine," said Mr. L, as he carefully removed himself from Mimi's grasp. "So, what's up? I heard that you guys wanted an extra man for something?"

"Yeah," said Mimi. "It's Nastasia. We wanted to make her feel better by showing her how to fall in love with other people, but gosh, we only made her feel worse. Do you think you could help us with that?"

"Oh, sure," said Mr. L. "You don't think Brobot would need to be here for this... do you?"

"No," Mimi replied. "I'm pretty sure this doesn't need to involve Brobot."

"Oh. Well, I'll still do it."

Mimi giggled. "Okay," she said. She pulled him real close. "This is what I want you to do," she whispered.

* * *

"This whole dimension is made of scum," Count Bleck grumbled as he finished wiping a bench clean. They were on one of Rogueport's many streets, and like all the others it was covered with dirt, trash, and graffiti. His backside had an enormous grease and dirt stain from where he'd tried to sit down only a moment before.

"Don't say that," Tippi said sadly. "You sound too much... well, you sound too much like your old self when you say that."

Count Bleck sighed. "I was talking about this kind of scum," he said. He held up the rag he had been using to wipe the bench. It was caked thick with dirt and mold.

"I know," Tippi said. "I just don't like it when you talk like that."

"I'm sorry. You know what they say about old habits." He looked up quickly at her. "Habits, my dear, not personalities!"

He sat down on the bench, and Tippi came to rest behind him. "I guess I just worry," she said sadly. "It's been so long since we were together before, I worry that you might have changed."

"People change," said Count Bleck. "Time changes everything. I'm not the same man I was when we were parted, but I assure you I'm also not the man I was when we met again."

"I believe you."

"I had a friend who used to say, "_Ko-in ya no gotoshi._" It means, 'Time flies like an arrow,' or so I've been told."

"Why did he say that?"

"I don't know... he spoke English just fine." Count Bleck stifled a yawn and looked around the town. "Strange," he said to himself. Then, to Tippi, "I have been thinking... this would make a really great project. Fix it up a little? This is exactly the sort of place we want to make better."

"And what would you have done with it?"

"I'm not sure... maybe give the Robbos something more constructive to do and take the Piantas down a few pegs. That should take care of at least half the crime in this city." Count Bleck laughed.

"You've been acting so strangely," said Tippi.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know..." she thought about that, trying to collect her words. "Remember when we were having dinner at the inn? I said you never really looked like you belonged somewhere? Well... I've never seen you quite so casual before, at all. You just told a joke a second ago, with the old proverb. It wasn't funny, but it was a joke. I never hear you make jokes."

Count Bleck didn't answer. He crumpled up the rag he had used to clean the bench and tucked it into his pocket. Then he put his hands back around his wife, and looked out into the sky.

"Why is that?" she asked.

"I haven't felt this good in years," he replied. "I haven't felt this good before, ever. There's no weight. There's no stress in secrecy, there's no pain of loss... I haven't felt this free since before I even knew you." She looked into his eyes. "Timpani, every night since we've been together, I've woken up, in the middle of the night, terrified that everything that happened before was just a dream. I was afraid that I would realize that the void was still open, and I was still alone. I've had to check, to make sure you were still there, and that it really did happen.

"Last night, I didn't wake up at all. Not once. And when I woke up this morning, the thought that everything may have been a dream didn't even occur to me, not until I realized that it didn't." He took a deep breath, and tried to feel if he was done with his story or not. "Timpani," he said at last, "it's the most amazing feeling in the world."

* * *

Nastasia was cleaning the last of the tissues off her floor when there was a knock at the door. She looked up- if it was one of the others coming to mess with her love life again.. but still she did have to answer the door.

"Who is it?" she called.

Mr. L opened the door. He was carrying a bouquet of flowers that looked as gorgeous as the ones grown in Flower Fields, and he smiled in an extremely inviting manner. "Good evening, Nastasia," he said politely. "I do believe you have a gentleman caller."

"What is this?" Nastasia groaned. "Did the others put you up to it?"

"What do you mean?" he asked. "I was just sitting in my house back in the Mushroom Kingdom, and thought, you know, nobody ever gives Nastasia flowers. A pretty woman like that ought to have a man give her flowers once in a while, don't you think?"

"No, I don't," said Nastasia flatly. She walked to the other side of the room and put her back to Mr. L. "Now, if you don't mind, I'm very busy."

"Shall I leave these here?" he asked? "To remind you of what a wonderful, lovable person you are-"

Nastasia turned around and pointed her finger out the door. "OUT. NOW. ...'K?"

Mr. L put his hands up and backed out the door. "Okay, okay, sorry," he mumbled. As soon as he backed out, Nastasia stormed across the room and slammed the door. A second later, she locked it.

Mr L. turned to his left. Around the corner, Mimi and Dimentio were peeking and watching. Mimi looked extremely dejected.

"I'm not sure why you thought that would help," said Mr. L flatly.

"Oh, boy," Mimi sighed. "Nothing we do seems to work."

Mimi turned back around the corner, leaned against the wall, and sank to the floor. O'Chunks was standing a little ways down the hallway, watching the action. "Have yeh got any more bright ideas, then?" he asked.

"I guess not," Mimi said sadly. "Thanks anyway, everybody. I guess there isn't really anything we can do for her."

Nastasia yanked the door open and shouted, "Yeah, well, that's what I've been saying this whole time, now, isn't it?" She slammed the door closed again. "Now stop hanging around my door!"

"Come on, guys," Mimi grumbled. "Let's all go do... some other stuff, I guess..."


	4. 1 dash 4

_Funny story- I woke up just in time to catch the new Care Bears show on CBS this morning. In the second half Cheer Bear was trying to make Grumpy Bear feel better because he was especially grumpy. Except Cheer was only doing things that would have made _her_ feel better, and didn't stop to think about what Grumpy really needed. I know it's hardly an original storyline I'm using, I'm just impressed that the very day I'm finishing the story, on the one kid's cartoon I've watched since I started, they're showing the same story. How neat is that? _

EPISODE 1-4

Four days later, the tension in Castle Bleck still had not settled down. The minions weren't really even talking to each other, although they weren't entirely unfriendly if they met in the hallways. Nastasia kept herself shut up in her room as much as possible, as did Mimi. O'Chunks didn't have the words to say to anybody, and Dimentio was simply enjoying the days.

It was on the fourth day after Count Bleck and Tippi left, Dimentio was floating down the hallway, singing a song to himself, when he passed by Mimi.

"Mimi," he said, landing on the floor in front of her. "I haven't seen you around all day. What have you been up to?"

"Go away, Dimentio," said Mimi, stepping around him. "I don't want to talk to you."

"Have I done something to offend you?" asked Dimentio, falling into pace beside Mimi. "If you tell me what it is, I'll surely apologize for it."

"I don't want to talk to anybody!" Mimi snapped angrily. Dimentio stopped in his tracks, and Mimi stormed on.

He snapped his fingers and disappeared, reappearing in front of Mimi again.

"Isn't that something," he said as if to himself. "You went out and tried to make Nastasia feel better, and all you did was make yourself feel worse."

Mimi shoved Dimentio out of the way so hard he banged his head on the wall. "Go AWAY, Dimentio!" she shouted.

Dimentio rubbed his head where it had hit the wall. "Mimi, sometimes I think you don't know your own strength," he said, checking his hand.

She turned around. "I didn't hurt you, did I? Gosh, I'm sorry."

Dimentio shook his head and checked his eyes before continuing. Mimi stopped walking and stood next to him to listen.

"Mimi," he said, "The road to the Underwhere is paved with good intentions. All I'm saying is that there's more to helping than... than just that, good intentions."

"What do you mean?"

Dimentio sighed. "I'm not very good at this, am I? What I mean is, I know what you need to do to make it right."

"You mean how to make Nastasia feel better?" Mimi asked hopefully. She bounced up in anticipation.

Dimentio shook his head. "No, no," he said. "That's just it- if you want to make it better, you have to understand you can't _make her happy again."_

Mimi stopped bouncing. "Oh," she said dejectedly.

"Yes," he said. "I figured I would say something now, before the Count returned... I thought you might like to straighten everything out before his arrival. I'm sure he wouldn't be happy to hear you spent the whole week meddling with love rather than getting any work done. Dimentio lifted himself back up in the air. "Anyway, I must go. Count Bleck will return any time now, and I will be there to greet him. Ciao!"

"Wait, what?" Mimi tried to stop him. "We had _work_?"

"Yes, we did," said Dimentio. "I'm sure you would have remembered to ask Nastasia for your assignment had you not been too busy avoiding her."

"WHY DIDN'T YOU REMIND ME?"

"I shouldn't have to." Dimentio snapped his fingers and disappeared.

Mimi let out a frustrated shout. "Grah!" She stormed down the hallway as fast as she could. "I can't believe him! Even when he's trying to be _nice_, he's a meanie!"

* * *

Only an hour after that encounter, Count Bleck and Tippi returned. Right away they gathered in the meeting room, as was the custom when the Count returned from away. Everyone in the castle was in their positions- Mimi, O'Chunks, Dimentio, and Mr. L were on their platforms, and Nastasia and Tippi were up with Count Bleck, overlooking them all. The Beige Prognosticus hovered beside him.

"Hail Bleck!" his minions cheered.

The Count smiled. "I see that we have a new old face joining us today," he said. "Mr. L, what brings you back to our ranks?"

"I got a call asking me to come over to help with something," Mr. L. explained. "And since nobody was home where I was, I decided to hang around here, see what was going on, maybe help out a little. Also, Dimentio brought me here and nobody's sent me back, and I can't leave by myself."

"No, of course not," said Count Bleck. "We'll have to work on that."

Count Bleck looked over his minions. He could tell that something was wrong, so he decided to keep them a little longer. "So," he said casually, "Is there anything to report to Count Bleck? Anything noteworthy happen while I was away?"

Mimi, O'Chunks, Dimentio, and Mr. L all exchanged tentative glances, but it was Nastasia who spoke up first. "No, Count," she said. "Everything was pretty quiet while you two were away. We didn't get a lot of done, though."

Count Bleck pulled down on the brim of his hat to cover his face. "I see," he said. He looked to his other minions. "Is that so?"

They all nodded quickly.

"Very well," said the Count. "I'm sorry to hear that nothing much happened... although I do suppose it's better that nothing bad happened, isn't it?"

"Yeah," said Nastasia.

"Very well, minions, you are dismissed."

Mimi couldn't get out of there soon enough. O'Chunks and Mr. L followed right behind her. Dimentio looked around for a moment, opened his mouth, but decided the better of it and left as well.

"So," said Count Bleck. "Now that it's just you and me-"

"And me," Tippi interjected.

"And Timpani," he added. He looked up at her. "I wasn't going to forget you." Then he turned back to Nastasia and continued, "Now that it's just the three of us, would you like to tell me what really happened?"

Nastasia straitened her glasses. "Um... No, Count, I really don't think there's anything to report."

He looked her up and down. "All right," he said. "I'll take your word for it. Timpani, wait here for a moment. I have to make another entry in this book." He disappeared with the book before one of them had a chance to say anything- mainly, that nothing worth noting had actually happened yet.

Nastasia stood there uncomfortably, watching Tippi hang in the air. Finally, she said, "I had better take care of a few things."

"Is this about me and Blumiere?" asked Tippi.

"What?"

"Come on," Tippi said, "I've seen the way you've been acting, ever since we came back. I know how you feel about him, because I feel the same way. If it bothers you so much, why do you stay?"

Nastasia shook her head. "I couldn't leave," she said. "I swore my allegiance to him."

"He let you go."

"That doesn't make a difference."

Tippi sighed. "You know it's not the end of the world, right?"

"Not anymore, it's not," said Nastasia. "When he couldn't have you, it was."

"I'll give you that... but you know the Count loves you very much."

Nastasia looked up at her, surprised. She opened her mouth partways, and said surprisingly softly, "What did you say?"

"I said, the Count loves you very much," Tippi repeated. "He'll never love you the way he loves me... but there is a part of him that always did love you in some way, as well. He cares very much about you and enjoys your company. He appreciates you and is thankful to have you around. He isn't in love with you, but you mean a lot to him."

Nastasia blushed and looked at her feet. "Um... yeah," she muttered. "Is that so?"

"Yeah," Tippi said, "Is that what you needed to hear? Because every word of it is true."

Nastasia didn't say anything.

Just then, Count Bleck reappeared in his usual spot, with the book by his side. "All finished," he said cheerfully.

"Us, too," said Tippi.

"Wonderful, said Count Bleck. Shall we get to work?"

"Yeah," said Nastasia. "Let's get to work. I have us scheduled for an appointment to get started on something..."

"Wonderful," Count Bleck said. "I have just the something to get started on. Our couple's vacation inadvertently turned into a fact-finding mission..."

THE END


End file.
